Back to Work

I started back to work this week with mixed emotions. 

Fear

I was afraid of leaving the kids - especially Norah.  I knew Olivia and Braden would be just fine without me - I think they actually benefit from the interaction they receive at Kristin and Heathers' houses.  It was Norah that worried me.  She is so little, so sweet, and so mine! :)  I was afraid of missing her daily smiles, not being the one to make her happy and spending my entire work day thinking about her.

Excitement

There were traces of excitement flowing through me as well.  I really enjoy my job and love working with Kristin. I often wonder if I'll regret giving up such a wonderful situation.  It's about as perfect as they come but the longing to be home with my children is still nagging.  I think I'd regret more not trying the stay at home mom thing.  I was excited to see the class, excited to have something of my own, and excited to teach!

Sadness

Going back to work meant that Norah is already 3 months old. I don't know why I've become such a sap about them growing up but I feel like it's happening before my eyes and I have this clear vision of a teenager who wants nothing to do with me. I feel like I have to soak it all up before they grow.  This is easier some days than others!! :)

Relief

The week is obviously over and I feel much relieved.  Norah did wonderful at Heather's and Braden and Olivia seemed to enjoy the change of pace.  My two days at work (yes, I know --- what in the world am I complaining about right?) went very well and by the end of day two I felt back in the swing of things.  It's almost as though I never left.  I'm ready to absorb and enjoy what I can over the next couple of months since I'm not sure when I'll be back in the classroom.

Thankfulness

I am so thankful that I have the wonderful, loving husband that I do.  This transition was much more smooth than I had anticipated and it's in large part due to him.  He listened to me cry and dried my tears, assured me that all would be okay, dropped all three kids off at their designated spots in the morning and sent me the BEAUTIFUL flowers above on my first day back.  He has a heart of gold and I really, really appreciate the love and helpfulness he gave me this last week.  I love you honey.